He opened a new ezine
spe­cific­ally ded­ic­ated to
the writ­ing of extremely
bad poetry to encour­age
the vit­riol of its readers.

Any form, any sub­ject
mat­ter was wel­come as
long as it insul­ted the
mas­ters and included
some crudely writ­ten
sex or violence.

The sub­mis­sion guidelines read:
“Send in your worst shit. Stuff you wouldn’t even use to wipe your ass with. The crasser, the more deranged — the bet­ter! Send in work which will force our read­ers to howl in exec­ra­tion. Make them want to con­sume your entrails and then bury your sad ass alive.

The worst poem will receive a signed copy of my latest chap­book: ‘Saints, Sad­ists & Mother Fuck­ers’. (Ed.)”

*

Dur­ing the first week, his site ‘The Scath­ing Critic’
received in excess of 10,000 hits.
The poetry is foul. Vomit­ous.
It makes the editor gag in jubil­a­tion.
The poetry really stinks!

*

The win­ning entry selec­ted for the first Poem of the Week is posted:

My Poetry is So Bad …

My poetry is so bad that my con­crete poems are made out of con­crete.
My poetry is so bad it thinks a mixed meta­phor is an alco­holic bever­age.
My poetry is so bad it con­siders read­ings on gender as a sig­nal to cross-dress.
In fact, my poetry is so bad that instead of rejec­tion let­ters I receive lumps of shit.

George Ander­son grew up in Montreal and now lives in North Wollon­gong, Aus­tralia. He has pub­lished over 420 poems since 2002. His chap­book, ‘Dan­cing On Thin Ice’, is avail­able though erbacce-press. He blogs at BOLD MONKEY.